Patrick 100WC – Week 24

THE UGLY Dinosaur

Once upon a time it was summer in the country. Five eggs hatched in the barn. Only four baby ducks hatched. The next day the egg opened. Four pretty baby ducks went to the barn, they looked up and saw a massive dinosaur. It was very ugly with razor sharp teeth. The four ducks ran away because they were scared it might eat them.  They quacked to Mum for help. Mum came and the dinosaur smashed open the barn door. He ran away. He saw a pretty bird flying in the sky. Maybe one day he will turn into one.

 

3 thoughts on “Patrick 100WC – Week 24

  1. Hi Patrick,

    I really love all the the descriptive words you have used, like ‘massive’ and ‘smashed’. The ending of your story makes me wonder what might happen in the future, great work!
    Keep up the fantastic writing!

    Miss T 🙂

  2. Hi Patrick,
    I loved this story! Changing the ugly duckling to be about a dinosaur was inspired – well done.
    I wonder what sort of dinosaur it was? Would it have been friendly to the ducks, like a stegosaurus, or would it have tried to gobble them up, like a velociraptor? I like the description you used of the dinosaur to help me picture it – I imagined a huge T-Rex, towering over the terrified ducks!
    Next time, could you use time connectives to show the order of your story? Words like then, next or a few minutes later would really help your story flow.

    Keep up the good work!
    Mr Hyde
    Team 100WC
    Willoughby, Lincolnshire, England

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